And 2013 begins!
Mom finally came out of the crazy hallucinatory fun on Sunday night, with a return to reality. Her reality, however, was based about 20 years ago or earlier.
"When are they leaving? Where do we live? Who lives here? Why didn't anyone tell me this is where we live?"
Dad, not really having the patience to answer any of those questions, brought her upstairs to me. I brought her into their room. "Here's your bed, your dresser, and your things. You live here, with us."
Ma: "Since when? and why? Am I cuckoo?"
Me: "Well, for a while, the house in Lordship you sold to Nancy, and then she sold it and you came here to live with us. You do have an illness that messes with your memories and your brain."
Ma: "So we don't live there anymore?"
Me: "Nope, not for about 9 years now."
She didn't remember Florida at all, nor did she ask where Nancy was, or what was going on with her. Dad just kept quiet, watching me handle Mom. It really was killing me inside, but then I thought this was her first real moment of clarity since before Christmas. She knew that she didn't know. For some people that may have been freaky, however, for me it was actually a good thing. Moments of clarity are few and far between. We continued talking about what had happened over the past 10 or so years, primarily about living arrangements. I explained that none of the kids lived here anymore, but that Meghan and Miah came around frequently, and Casey called all the time. I really felt like it was my Mom that I was talking to, and not a shell that held tiny bits and pieces of what was left of her.
Dad didn't get any of that, though. He wanted to know what would make her stop..."Isn't there some drug to give her to keep her brain quiet?"
Yeah, he said that, out loud. It must be really hard for him to know that she mostly doesn't know and doesn't know that she doesn't know (think about it). The good thing for Dad is that most of the time he can't hear what anyone says, let alone Mom! See Dad has hearing aids.
Many years ago, Dad fell off a very tall ladder when he worked for SNET. He hit his head, and lost most of his hearing in one ear and some in another. Now, we had a good time with that until he finally got is first set of hearing aids. Then we had to be careful when he "had his ears on". Last year, the VA replaced his old school "flesh colored" plastic ones with brandy new little ear buds. He spent months telling us how much of our tax money those little babies cost.
"Over 10,000 dollars of YOUR money", he gloated, on a regular basis. In May, Mom and Dad had to come back from Florida in a hurry. He was sitting with us one night, and couldn't hear a thing we said. I asked him where his ears were. He told us he left them in Florida, because "your sister rushed us out so fast". Since May, we've heard about these damn ears, how he left them in his drawer in his dresser in Florida.
The time has come for Mom and Dad not to go south like they have for the past 22 years. Because of that, Miah and I just made a trip to Florida to get important memories and other things that were left down there. Of course, the $10K ears were top of the list, along with pictures, a waffle iron, jewelry boxes.
Miah and I searched that damn house - every drawer, every box, every cabinet, every where a 77 year old man would have hidden something of such importance. No luck. We found many other pretty cool things, and lots of real junk.
Today, as I am sitting in my office, contemplating many problems in the world and in my life, Dad comes in...he's holding a black special box that looks like a big eyeglass case. "Look what I found", he says, proudly, and opens the box to show me his freakin' hearing aids. "They were on top of the cabinet in our room this whole time."
Clarity...
Dad didn't get any of that, though. He wanted to know what would make her stop..."Isn't there some drug to give her to keep her brain quiet?"
Yeah, he said that, out loud. It must be really hard for him to know that she mostly doesn't know and doesn't know that she doesn't know (think about it). The good thing for Dad is that most of the time he can't hear what anyone says, let alone Mom! See Dad has hearing aids.
Many years ago, Dad fell off a very tall ladder when he worked for SNET. He hit his head, and lost most of his hearing in one ear and some in another. Now, we had a good time with that until he finally got is first set of hearing aids. Then we had to be careful when he "had his ears on". Last year, the VA replaced his old school "flesh colored" plastic ones with brandy new little ear buds. He spent months telling us how much of our tax money those little babies cost.
"Over 10,000 dollars of YOUR money", he gloated, on a regular basis. In May, Mom and Dad had to come back from Florida in a hurry. He was sitting with us one night, and couldn't hear a thing we said. I asked him where his ears were. He told us he left them in Florida, because "your sister rushed us out so fast". Since May, we've heard about these damn ears, how he left them in his drawer in his dresser in Florida.
The time has come for Mom and Dad not to go south like they have for the past 22 years. Because of that, Miah and I just made a trip to Florida to get important memories and other things that were left down there. Of course, the $10K ears were top of the list, along with pictures, a waffle iron, jewelry boxes.
Miah and I searched that damn house - every drawer, every box, every cabinet, every where a 77 year old man would have hidden something of such importance. No luck. We found many other pretty cool things, and lots of real junk.
Today, as I am sitting in my office, contemplating many problems in the world and in my life, Dad comes in...he's holding a black special box that looks like a big eyeglass case. "Look what I found", he says, proudly, and opens the box to show me his freakin' hearing aids. "They were on top of the cabinet in our room this whole time."
Clarity...
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