So MUCH to tell!
Well, it's been a while since the last post, so I am certainly behind! Lots going on so here goes...
Dad has decided he MUST go to Florida. He needs to clean out the house of his and Mom's stuff, so he can sell it. The status of his trip changed daily. "I'm going to drive by myself, and I'm leaving Thursday." "I'm going to fly and rent a storage unit in Florida for our important things." "I'm taking your mother and there's nothing you can do about it. We're leaving Thursday and driving down." "I'm going to fly with your mother, and fly back."
These statements were heard by so many people as well. Dad picked up his mother's habit of calling everyone in the world he knows every day. Over the course of the first 2 weeks in March, his plans daily changed. Finally, he made his decision. "I'm flying out on Easter, renting a car, and driving it back with our important stuff. You can watch Mommy, right?"
So I booked his flight, he got his transportation all hooked up. I had just gotten back from New Orleans when he told me. When I say I just got back, I mean JUST got back. My flight landed at JFK, 10 pm...I walked in the door at home at 11:20 pm, popped into the 'rents' room, and Dad came out with the information before I even said Hello. Since that night, he has been like a college kid going on Spring Break. He keeps calling his friends to remind them he won't be around. Now, I only hear one side of the conversation, but I'm sure the friends are thinking they'll get a break for a week!
My sister doesn't think it's a good idea for him to drive back alone, but she doesn't want to go with him and neither can anyone else! She has told him this, which makes no sense to me...if you can't solve what you see as a problem, be quiet. What I've learned over the past year, you know?
Gradually, Dad has been abdicating responsibility for Mom. This is not surprising to any of us, but it can manifest itself in interesting and funny ways. A few years ago, they got sweatshirts from my niece and nephew with Disney pictures on them. One shirt says "We love you Grammie", the other "We love you Poppie". One shirt is a small, the other extra large. I keep telling Dad, and showing him that putting Mom's clothes out the night before is the best way to keep her less confused. He never remembers ("what????")...so of course, he's running around in the morning and yelling at her to get dressed.
He really likes some drama, let me just say here. No drama, nothing to bitch about, no complaining possible. I'm sure you have all figured out what happened the other day...Mom went to her Adult Day program, and all sorts of things with the "We love you Poppie" gigantic sweatshirt on!
Gotta love it...Last night, I had a speaking gig at City Lights Gallery in downtown Bridgeport, supporting the First Ladies Show currently happening at the Gallery. I hesitantly told Dad about it, not sure how it would go, but thinking they would enjoy the social part of the gig. They went, and Mom stepped up her game a bit, chatting to people, and following the program with a smile and appropriate responses. Dad had to be shushed at one point, but he also enjoyed the event. The support that they, along with other family and friends, and of course, my husband, provided, was all I could hope for.
Both of these experiences - the observations of the trip planning, and the 'rents at the Gallery - made me think that our own selves remain young and true to our youthful selves at some level always. If we are social when young, we want to stay social. If we are not detail oriented about our family when young, we aren't going to pick it up later! And if we support our family and friends early on, it will continue as we age.
Dad has decided he MUST go to Florida. He needs to clean out the house of his and Mom's stuff, so he can sell it. The status of his trip changed daily. "I'm going to drive by myself, and I'm leaving Thursday." "I'm going to fly and rent a storage unit in Florida for our important things." "I'm taking your mother and there's nothing you can do about it. We're leaving Thursday and driving down." "I'm going to fly with your mother, and fly back."
These statements were heard by so many people as well. Dad picked up his mother's habit of calling everyone in the world he knows every day. Over the course of the first 2 weeks in March, his plans daily changed. Finally, he made his decision. "I'm flying out on Easter, renting a car, and driving it back with our important stuff. You can watch Mommy, right?"
So I booked his flight, he got his transportation all hooked up. I had just gotten back from New Orleans when he told me. When I say I just got back, I mean JUST got back. My flight landed at JFK, 10 pm...I walked in the door at home at 11:20 pm, popped into the 'rents' room, and Dad came out with the information before I even said Hello. Since that night, he has been like a college kid going on Spring Break. He keeps calling his friends to remind them he won't be around. Now, I only hear one side of the conversation, but I'm sure the friends are thinking they'll get a break for a week!
My sister doesn't think it's a good idea for him to drive back alone, but she doesn't want to go with him and neither can anyone else! She has told him this, which makes no sense to me...if you can't solve what you see as a problem, be quiet. What I've learned over the past year, you know?
Gradually, Dad has been abdicating responsibility for Mom. This is not surprising to any of us, but it can manifest itself in interesting and funny ways. A few years ago, they got sweatshirts from my niece and nephew with Disney pictures on them. One shirt says "We love you Grammie", the other "We love you Poppie". One shirt is a small, the other extra large. I keep telling Dad, and showing him that putting Mom's clothes out the night before is the best way to keep her less confused. He never remembers ("what????")...so of course, he's running around in the morning and yelling at her to get dressed.
He really likes some drama, let me just say here. No drama, nothing to bitch about, no complaining possible. I'm sure you have all figured out what happened the other day...Mom went to her Adult Day program, and all sorts of things with the "We love you Poppie" gigantic sweatshirt on!
Gotta love it...Last night, I had a speaking gig at City Lights Gallery in downtown Bridgeport, supporting the First Ladies Show currently happening at the Gallery. I hesitantly told Dad about it, not sure how it would go, but thinking they would enjoy the social part of the gig. They went, and Mom stepped up her game a bit, chatting to people, and following the program with a smile and appropriate responses. Dad had to be shushed at one point, but he also enjoyed the event. The support that they, along with other family and friends, and of course, my husband, provided, was all I could hope for.
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